


if your heart was a prison

by RosesAndEdgars



Category: Orange is the New Black
Genre: Cheesy Lines, F/F, Season 1, i guess, idk the time frame exactly, pure cheesy fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-04
Updated: 2014-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-11 17:51:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2077458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosesAndEdgars/pseuds/RosesAndEdgars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>…I would like to be sentenced for life.  Piper has never been one for the cheesy pickup lines, but when it’s the inevitable Alex Vause she can make an exception.  After a while.  vauseman.</p>
            </blockquote>





	if your heart was a prison

“So.”

Piper glanced up from her tray, glaring at Alex with the darkest look she could muster.  The brunette smirked and pushed her glasses up to her head.

“Did it hurt when you fell to heaven and landed in an international drug cartel?” Alex flirted, winking.  Piper groaned, resisting the urge to slam her head against the tray.

Instead, she stood up, picked up her tray, and walked to the other side of the room.  She heard Alex give a loud sigh behind her.

 _It’s her own fault for using such a stupid line,_ she thought bitterly.

* * *

There had been a rather hot wave for the past week, and most of the girls had been staying inside since they had gotten sunburned on the first day they went outside.  Piper had managed to avoid getting burnt for the most part.  Only her forearms were burnt, but it wasn’t anything too bad.

She sat with Nicky for their lunchbreak, munching on the sandwich Red had made.  They were talking about the latest prison gossip when Piper’s nightmare dressed as a tall hot brunette girl with glasses walked up to them.  Piper tensed up.

“Hey, Vause,” Nicky greeted, looking up. “Don’t you have work?”

Alex shrugged. “I’m on break.  I thought it would be nice to walk around for a bit.”

Nicky scoffed, shaking her head. “Are you kidding me?  It’s so fucking hot I’m sweating in places no one should sweat.”

Alex sniggered and sat down next to Piper.  She gave a small nod to Nicky.  The messy-haired woman had grinned back.

“Well, looks like Watson wants me for something.  Better go check what it is.” And with that, Nicky left the two on their own.  Piper gaped after her, shocked that the _traitor_ would leave her alone with Alex.

She glanced at Alex, who raised her eyebrows. “Are you sure they should be making you work in this weather?” she asked, scanning Piper up and down with worry.

“I’m sure,” Piper snapped back, crossing her arms and glaring away from her ex.

“Do you have a sunburn --”

Piper was about to turn around and say that _of course she did, are you fucking blind?_ , but when she opened her mouth Alex cut in with, “or are you always this hot?”

Piper shot Alex a dark glare and muttered, “Nicky wants me.”  She walked away from Alex, hiding the faint blush on her cheeks.

* * *

She dreaded every moment she had to take her clothes to laundry.  Either she had to face Pennsatucky and her gang, or she had to face Alex and her _stupid_ cheesy pickup lines.

Today, it was Alex.

Piper sighed and handed Alex her bag, noting the darkness in the room.  The light switch wasn’t turned on.  Confused, she frowned and began to ask if the light needed fixing.

“Kid, you must be a light switch,” Alex started.

“Oh fuck no,” Piper groaned as Alex flicked the switch and the lights flashed back on again.

“’Cause every time I see you, you turn me on.”

“I – I want to punch you,” Piper sighed, taking her torn slip of paper and hiding the smile that was tugging at her lips.

Alex grinned back.

* * *

She needed to talk to Morello about some stupid argument that herself and Big Boo had about West Side Story when she passed Alex’s bunk.  The brunette was reading a book, her eyes focused on the page.  Piper held back a sigh of relief and continued to Morello.  There was a cold chill in the air.

A minute later, Piper was walking back, feeling satisfied that she had now won a chocolate bar.  It didn’t stop her shivering from the cold though.

“You look cold.  Want to use me as a blanket?”

She stopped in her tracks, moaning.  The cheesy lines were back again.

“I’m fine.”  Although going into bed with Alex didn’t seem like a bad idea… not that she would actually do it (again).

Alex gave a small laugh and stood up, leaning on the wall of the bunk, her face suddenly dropping to a serious expression. “I hear they’re adding extra time to your sentence.”

Piper’s heart beat up in panic.  Her eyes widened as she stared back at Alex, gasping. “ _What?_ Why?”

She knew she had fallen for Alex’s trap when the other girl smirked and replied back playfully, “because it’s a crime to be that sexy.”

Piper felt the heat rising to her cheeks as she glared at Alex. “I just want to punch you sometimes,” she growled.  Alex smiled brightly as Piper’s face went redder.

* * *

“Vause, you wearing a jacket!” Taystee said in surprise. “You look like Pennsatucky!”

Alex shot Taystee a disgusted glance. “I was cold, and I need to use this for a pickup line,” she replied. “I don’t want to look like bible bitch.”

Taystee rolled her eyes and walked away, leaving Alex alone in the REC room to wait for her victim.

Piper walked in the room not a minute later.  Alex felt a grin creeping its way up to her lips as she approached the blonde.

“I got a new jacket,” she said, holding out a sleeve. “Feel it.”

Piper eyed her warily, staring down at the sleeve. “You’re just going to say some stupid pickup line,” she pointed out.

Alex shook her head. “No, it’s just soft.  Come on, feel it,” she insisted, shaking her arm.  Piper slowly bought her hand down and caressed it, her eyes widening.

“It’s actually soft.  What’s it made out of?”

 _She fell for it._ “Girlfriend material,” Alex answered.

Piper opened her mouth slightly, then closed it.  The corners of her lips tugged upwards.

“That – that was good,” she admitted, smiling brightly.  Alex’s heart skipped a beat.  She moved in closer to Piper.

“Would you touch my hand again so I can tell everyone else I’ve been touched by an angel?”

Piper backtracked from Alex, groaning. “You ruined it.”

When she met Alex’s eyes again, they were both grinning.

* * *

Piper had dragged a confused Alex into a closet, closing the door behind them and moving in close to the other girl.  Alex had raised her eyebrows.

“If your heart was a  prison –” Alex began.  Piper moaned and shoved her lips against Alex’s lips.  Alex widened her eyes at first, then relaxed into the kiss.  They stayed like that for a while, just with their lips pressed against each other.  It had been a while since they’d done that.  Just a normal kiss.

They pulled away after what seemed to be too short of time, both flushed and breathing heavily.

“I – I forgot my pickup line,” Piper said, running a hand through Alex’s hair.

“What?” the brunette asked, kissing Piper’s collarbone.

Piper moaned with pleasure. “’Cause I was just so distracted by you.”

Alex chuckled, pushing her glasses up to the top of her head.


End file.
